Quick 'N Dirty Review: True Blood

Before we start, here's a quick look at the rating system that we use here at The Dirtywhirl:


100-95 - Classic Show; (In best Bill O'Reilly voice) "WE'LL DO IT LIVE!!"
94-85 - Upper Echelon Show; You Should DVR This And Watch It The Same Night
84-75 - Very, Very Good; You Should Make An Effort To Watch This Within A Few Days Of Airing
74-65 - Not Bad At All; Let These Shows Pile Up On Your DVR But Watch 'Em Eventually
64-55 - Fold The Laundry While You Watch These
54-0 - Don't Waste Your Time; You're Smarter Than This (Probably) 

Now... onto the review:

True Blood | Season 3

 “Conscience off. Dick on.” Andy Bellefleur to Jason Stackhouse

Oh, True Blood, you almost had me at Nazi werewolves. Actually, no, not really. HBO’s breakout hit vampire drama, True Blood, has returned for its third season and after the first half of its 2010 run of episodes I’m left wondering why I’m still bothering to watch it. Following last season’s incredibly weak season-long arc about Maryann Forrester (Michelle Forbes), the Maenad (explanation here) that took over and possessed the town by forcing them into orgies by shaking her body or some such shit, I’d hoped that the series would return to something more closely resembling the somewhat tight plotting of season one’s whodunit serial killer angle but those hopes have been dashed in very short order, while greatly exposing some of the major flaws that have existed since the show’s debut season.

More than anything else, it’s becoming clear that series creator Alan Ball (American Beauty, Six Feet Under) doesn’t care much for character development. There’s literally no investment in any of the characters’ well-being which makes it impossible to care about anything that’s happening on screen. Do I care that central couple Sookie Stackhouse (Anna Paquin) and Bill Compton (Stephen Moyer) have been separated, pawns in a power grab by newcomer Russell Edgington (Denis O’Hare, Milk), the Vampire King of Mississippi? Nope. Am I interested by heartthrob Eric Northman’s (Alexander Skarsgard) mysterious quest for revenge that leads him to play both sides of the struggle between Edgington and Evan Rachel Wood’s Sophie-Anne Leclerq? Not particularly. How about Tara Thornton’s (Rutina Wesley) decent into a disturbing relationship with creepy vampire Franklin Mott (James Frain, The Tudors)? Nuh-uh. All of this is because, frankly, we haven’t been given any reason to care about these characters in the slightest. All of the storylines ring incredibly hollow. Even new characters like werewolf Alcide Herveaux (Joe Manganiello, How I Met Your Mother) and mysterious Crystal Norris (Lindsay Pulsipher, The Beast) were introduced in intriguing fashion only to fall flat in subsequent appearances. And I haven’t even mentioned what could realistically be described as the series’ nadir, bar owner Sam Merlotte’s (Sam Trammell) discovery of his shape-shifting, white trash birth family who use their shifting abilities to compete on the dogfighting circuit. You can’t make this shit up. Really, I wish I had made it up. It would make it easier to swallow.

It’s also frustrating that the series has largely abandoned the intriguing allegorical look at vampires as a stand-in for gay culture in mainstream America that initially gave the series more than a little promise. Unfortunately, that promise went unrealized as True Blood has morphed (much like its resident shapeshifters and werewolves) into a complete trash series that piles on its most prurient elements of blood and sex to exponentially high levels. Now, before I’m labeled a prude, understand that I don’t have any problems with the boobs and blood approach per se. Boobies make almost everything better. It’s only when that’s all the depth that there seems to be on True Blood (after seeming to set the bar higher) that I have to take a step back and wonder whether this is a show that’s still worth my time. There’s a place for trash TV but when a series like True Blood bows with as much potential as it showed in its first year and then largely abandons that approach for a lowest common denominator appeal, you have to wonder whether with all of the choices available to viewers these days if it’s still worthwhile viewing.

True Blood can’t even get out of its own way when it comes to the things that it does right. In one of the more promising storylines, town idiot Jason Stackhouse (Ryan Kwantan), after shooting someone in the head (somewhat in self defense) has had a revelatory moment and has decided to become a lawman. Really. It’s just as dumb as it sounds, but it’s played for laughs and is at least somewhat successful in that regard as the dumb cop/dumber cop pairing of Jason and Andy Bellefleur (Chris Bauer) does have potential even as it’s entirely unbelievable. The series also grossly underutilizes two of its best talents, Debra Ann Woll as Jessica Hambly, a newbie vampire struggling to deal with her new lifestyle, and Nelsan Ellis’s Lafayette Reynolds, the flamboyant drug dealer who in many ways is the series’ conscience. Funny that the writing staff has abandoned the previously mentioned allegory yet gives Ellis such strong material to play as an actual gay character. Ellis completely nails what he’s given, even if both he (and Woll, for that matter) are not given nearly enough to do.

Frankly, the fact that the Academy of Television Arts & Sciences (the Emmys nominating body) has deemed True Blood as one of the five best dramas on television (over much more deserving shows like Friday Night Lights, Justified, Sons Of Anarchy, and Treme, just to name a few) by giving it a Best Drama nod this year would be infuriating if the Emmys themselves weren’t already a joke. Lack of character development and pandering to the basest of instincts does not a Best Drama make. I suppose if True Blood draws eyeballs to HBO and thereby introduces audiences to better fare like Treme, Curb Your Enthusiasm, The Ricky Gervais Show, Boardwalk Empire, or Luck then I guess it’s served its purpose but really, there isn’t any more redeeming value in the show than that anymore. And that’s a shame because it coulda been a contenda. So, I’m pretty sure I’m out. Yeah… I think I’m out.

Dirty Rating: 48/100

What We've Been Listening To

Not that anyone asked, but here's a playlist of what we've been listening to lately at The Dirtywhirl's home offices:


The Roots, "Right On", How I Got Over
Suckers, "Before Your Birthday Ends", Wild Smile
Paramore, "When It Rains", Riot
Active Child, "I'm In Your Church At Night", Curtis Lane (EP)
Ariel Pink's Haunted Graffiti, "Hot Body Rub", Before Today
Def Leppard, "Hysteria", Hysteria (*)
Def Leppard, "Love Bites", Hysteria (*)
Skid Row, "I Remember You", Skid Row (*)
Pierce The Veil, "Bulletproof Love", Selfish Machines
The Bird And The Bee, "She's Gone", Interpreting The Masters, Vol. 1: A Tribute To Daryl Hall And John Oates
Pierce The Veil, "Caraphernelia", Selfish Machines
We Have Band, "Divisive", WHB
Active Child, "When Your Love Is Safe", Curtis Lane (EP)
Pierce The Veil, "Stay Away From My Friends", Selfish Machines
Pierce The Veil, "The Boy Who Could Fly", Selfish Machines


*What? We were in an 80s pop metal mood. It happens.

Quick 'N Dirty Review: The National | High Violet

Before we start, here's a quick look at the rating system that we use here at The Dirtywhirl:

100 - Classic Album; One Of The Best Of All Time
99-90 - Exceptional Work; Rush Out And Get This
89-80 - Very, Very Good; You Should Still Go Out And Get This
79-70 - Not Bad At All; Might Actually Be Worth Your Time
69-60 - Has Its Moments But On The Whole... Meh
59-50 - Won't Make Your Ears Bleed; Won't Make You Dance, Either
49-0 - Don't Waste Your Time; You're Smarter Than This (Probably) 

Now... onto the review:

The National | High Violet

Crafting one of the best albums of the past twenty years is a double-edged sword. On the one hand, the feeling of creating an indelible work of art that will stand as a musical high water mark must be indescribable. The National did that with their 2007 breakthrough record, Boxer. The other side of that sword, though, is that you’re going to create impossibly high expectations for a follow up which is unfortunately the case with the band's latest, High Violet. From any other act an album like this would be revelatory. The problem is that The National have proven that they’re capable of better. Sonically, the Dessner brothers have created a similar aural texture as heard on past records so where does the fault lie, then? Why does High Violet fall slightly short of the band's potential? Sadly, it’s with singer Matt Berninger’s lyrics. Berninger has never been the most straightforward lyricist in music but he’s even more obtuse than usual on more than a few of High Violet’s tracks and frankly, that’s to their detriment. I’m not one to need to have things spelled out lyrically but when the imagery that’s presented is extremely abstract at best and silly at worst, it takes power away from the music. “We’ll play nuns versus priests until somebody wins,” (“A Little Faith); “I was carried to Ohio in a swarm of bees/ I never married, but Ohio don’t remember me,” (“Bloodbuzz, Ohio”); and perhaps the worst offense, “Vanderlyle crybaby cry/ Man, it’s all been forgiven, swans are a-swimmin’/ I’ll explain everything to the geeks;” (“Vanderlyle Crybaby Geeks) are just a few of the inscrutable sobriquets tossed by Berninger on the record. Many times, as on “Vanderlyle Crybaby Geeks” (not only the record’s worst track but one of their worst overall – it's just ridiculous on so many levels), “Sorrow,” and “Lemon World,” the lyrics just kill dead any chance that the tracks would have had. Others, including “Conversation 16” (with its great textural instrumentation), “Runaway” (a track that feels tossed off but not necessarily in a bad way), and even the aforementioned “Bloodbuzz, Ohio” are able to overcome their clunky lyrics to affect something approaching respectability, while the opening “Terrible Love,” “Anyone’s Ghost,” and “Afraid Of Everyone” (the album’s best track that features Sufjan Stevens making a guest appearance for the second consecutive record and sees Berninger wailing “I don’t have the drugs to sort it out” and “In a way she’s swallowing my soul, soul, soul, soul”) are just straight triumphs. The album does close rather weakly and this could be a contributing factor in how it plays overall, but all of this is more than a little nitpicky because High Violet really is better than almost 80% of what’s been released so far this year. It’s the fucking National, fer chrissakes. It’s dark... it’s brooding... it’s what we want out of the band. While its faults are magnified due to the fact that this is a record by one of rock’s best bands, High Violet is still a very, very strong album and that speaks to the talent of The National in that they can overcome the obstacles presented in particular by the record’s lyrics to deliver such a solid (yet not spectacular) effort.

Standout Tracks: “Afraid Of Everyone;” “Terrible Love;” “Anyone’s Ghost;” “Bloodbuzz, Ohio;” “Conversation 16”

Dirty Rating: 84/100

Quick 'N Dirty Review: Gigi | Maintenant

Before we start, here's a quick look at the rating system that we use here at The Dirtywhirl:

100 - Classic Album; One Of The Best Of All Time
99-90 - Exceptional Work; Rush Out And Get This
89-80 - Very, Very Good; You Should Still Go Out And Get This
79-70 - Not Bad At All; Might Actually Be Worth Your Time
69-60 - Has Its Moments But On The Whole... Meh
59-50 - Won't Make Your Ears Bleed; Won't Make You Dance, Either
49-0 - Don't Waste Your Time; You're Smarter Than This (Probably) 

Now... onto the review:

Gigi | Maintenant

There’s comfort in examining the past. We get so caught up in the latest gadgets and in the newest advances that make our lives easier while simultaneously creating more problems for ourselves that it’s often comforting to think of a simpler time, even if you yourself never personally experienced that actual era. Speaking as a thirtysomething who grew up during the transition from Gen X to Gen Y, I wasn’t alive during the 60s but I’ll admit that I have at times wondered what my life would have been like had I lived during that decade. Gigi’s debut record, Maintenant, thoroughly re-creates the sound what I imagine this bygone era to be with stunning precision. Unlike many of the other notable releases of the retro-60s pop genre (Amy Winehouse’s Back To Black, Duffy’s Rockferry, Adele’s 19) that were solely sung from the ladies' perspective, Maintenant mixes both male and female voices, giving it a fresh take on the re-examination of classic pop. The nature of a 40-member (really… 40 MEMBER!) project likely leads to the disparity of sounds found on the record. The Brill Building sound of the first single, “No, My Heart Will Go On” stands next to the bossa nova of Parenthetical Girls leader Zac Pennington’s “Dreams Of Romance,” which shares space with the airy French pop of Katie Eastburn’s “The Marquee.” Maintenant runs the gamut of 60s pop styles yet manages to feel fresh. True, there’s nothing that can really be considered “new” on the record but the sound is pitch perfect for what Gigi was targeting. Maintenant creates atmosphere more than anything else – it’s easy to imagine any one of these songs playing over Mad Men’s closing credits, for example – but the lyrics are just as noteworthy for how they create a striking visual palette. You can almost feel the orange shag carpet under your feet and see the art deco walls as Pennington laments, “I showed up early to your costume party/ Dressed up like a pharaoh/ I really should have come as Robin Hood/ And done myself in with the arrow,” over skittering bossa nova on “Dreams Of Romance.” “Some Second Best” conjures an image of a trio of girls in poodle skirts cooing outside an ice cream shop while the lonely nature of “I’m Not Coming Out Tonight” and “Alone At The Pier” also shine. Maintenant is the sound of a band not really attempting to challenge its listeners per se, but instead providing them with a thoroughly accurate means for a comfortable escape to a simpler time.

Standout Tracks: “No, My Heart Will Go On;” “I’m Not Coming Out Tonight;” “Won’t Someone Tell Me?” “Alone At The Pier;” “The Marquee"

Dirty Rating: 88/100

Quick 'N Dirty Review: Deftones | Diamond Eyes

Before we start, here's a quick look at the rating system that we use here at The Dirtywhirl:

100 - Classic Album; One Of The Best Of All Time
99-90 - Exceptional Work; Rush Out And Get This
89-80 - Very, Very Good; You Should Still Go Out And Get This
79-70 - Not Bad At All; Might Actually Be Worth Your Time
69-60 - Has Its Moments But On The Whole... Meh
59-50 - Won't Make Your Ears Bleed; Won't Make You Dance, Either
49-0 - Don't Waste Your Time; You're Smarter Than This (Probably) 

Now... onto the review:

Deftones | Diamond Eyes

There’s no way to sugarcoat it – the Deftones’ Saturday Night Wrist was a bad album. Like, really bad. Like girls talking about poo and um... other things bad (seriously, listen closely to “Pink Cellphone”… or better yet don’t). Not only was it bad but it was the kind of record that calls a band’s right to exist into question. Should the Deftones even bother continuing if an effort like that was the best they could muster? This is why it’s heartening to see Chino & Co. headed back in the right direction with their latest record and first in four years, Diamond Eyes. The Deftones have always been smarter than your average meathead hard rock band and that’s long been their calling card. Their willingness to take risks and challenge the norm has always worked to their benefit, but that ethos failed them on their last go-round. Whereas the risks didn’t necessarily pay off on Saturday Night Wrist, it’s a return to basics on Diamond Eyes that has them balanced back on their axis. “Diamond Eyes” is immediately stronger than anything on the last record with its catchier chorus and self-titled record feel. Not far behind is “Rocket Skates” which is so heavy and so good as vocalist Chino Moreno screams, “Guns, razors, knives/ Fuck with me” over granite strength guitars. It’s four minutes of raw and naked emotion and energy and it’s an impressive thing that they have a track like this in them over twenty years into their careers. To anyone who’s hoping that the Deftones might be stashing White Pony II somewhere in the back of their collective subconscious, it’s probably time to give up that dream and just embrace what the Deftones have become – simply put, one of the most solid hard rock bands in the music business. That’s not to say flashes of White Pony brilliance aren’t still present. Albeit less experimental than their high water mark, “Beauty School” shares elements in common with “Passenger” or “Digital Bath” as Moreno howls, “You’re shooting stars/ From the barrel of your eyes/ And it drives me crazy/ Just drives me wild.” Another standout is “Sextape,” the record’s prettiest track (and yes, it’s more than a little strange describing a Deftones track that way) that piles layers of atmosphere on a steady build to a great chorus. Really, it’s easy to make a case that Moreno himself had become a metaphor for the band. He’d allowed himself to bloat (I mean, Jesus… dude was effing fat during the videos off of Saturday Night Wrist) but now he’s leaner and meaner, much like the band as a whole on Diamond Eyes. After hearing the band drop the fat and put out likely their hardest record since Around The Fur, clearly the Deftones should consider sticking around for at least another few records. And that’s a great thing. A really great thing.

Standout Tracks: “Rocket Skates;” “Sextape;” “Diamond Eyes;” “Beauty School”

Dirty Rating: 77/100

Quick 'N Dirty Review: Broken Social Scene | Forgiveness Rock Record

Before we start, here's a quick look at the rating system that we use here at The Dirtywhirl:

100 - Classic Album; One Of The Best Of All Time
99-90 - Exceptional Work; Rush Out And Get This
89-80 - Very, Very Good; You Should Still Go Out And Get This
79-70 - Not Bad At All; Might Actually Be Worth Your Time
69-60 - Has Its Moments But On The Whole... Meh
59-50 - Won't Make Your Ears Bleed; Won't Make You Dance, Either
49-0 - Don't Waste Your Time; You're Smarter Than This (Probably) 

Now... onto the review:

Broken Social Scene | Forgiveness Rock Record

No band in Canadian indie rock has a bigger profile than Broken Social Scene and I mean that both figuratively and literally (the band has included up to 19 members at various points). Due to the collective nature of the group, almost anyone who’s been involved in the Canadian indie scene has at least some tenuous connection to BSS over the years. After releasing a number of records by members of the band in the past few years that were de facto BSS records (including Kevin Drew’s Spirit Is, Brendan Canning’s Something For All Of Us) not to mention records by other members of the collective (Feist, Stars, Amy Millan, k-os, Jason Collett), Forgiveness Rock Record is the first one in five years to actually be a labeled as a proper BSS record. Was it worth the wait? Results are mixed. At this point in their career it’s becoming painfully obvious that the career heights of You Forgot It In People will never again be scaled by the band. And that can be fine, so long as the band is still producing quality tracks at a high level. And true, there are highs on Forgiveness Rock Record, but not enough to sustain the album. “World Sick” is a strong opening salvo from the record that speaks to the collective nature of the band as Drew sings; “We got a minefield of crippled affection/ All for the borrowed mirror connection/ That’s why I’m leaving this spoken protection/ I’m a romance addict so I can confess that” before what feels like the entirety of the 19 person membership chiming in for the chorus. “Texico Bitches” is very upbeat and lively and is definitely one of the stronger efforts here while the moody “Sweetest Kill” and the Eastern influenced “Ungrateful Little Father” also stand a cut above. However, it’s never a good sign when you’re constantly checking the tracklist to see how far into the record you are and I did that more than once through the record’s one hour running time. “Chase Scene” is appropriately titled as it sounds like it could be backing a 70s cop show chase scene and the track’s OK but it feels oddly lifeless, and that’s not the worst of it. “Art House Director” is too cutesy by half, “Forced To Love” feels like a limp rehash of Canning’s “Hit The Wall,” and “Meet Me In The Basement” and “Romance To The Grave” are just straight boring. Maybe everyone in BSS is so preoccupied with their own shit that, even though this is the first group record in a half decade, they don’t care as much about the band as a whole anymore. It wouldn’t be the first time that a band, even one as talented as BSS, fell prey to this kind of trap. But still, with the collective talent involved, it’s hard to call Forgiveness Rock Record anything other than a mild to medium disappointment.

Standout Tracks: “Sweetest Kill;” “World Sick;” “Texico Bitches;” “Ungrateful Little Father”

Dirty Rating: 74/100

Weekend News Dump

It's the Weekend News Dump. Because it's the weekend. And we're dumping news. The Weekend News Dump.

• In surprising yet highly welcome news, Daniel Tosh has officially become the most-watched host on Comedy Central as the ratings for the summer season of Tosh.0 have eclipsed those of both Jon Stewart's Daily Show and Stephen Colbert's Colbert Report. Clearly the reason is that Tosh.0 features more puke. Never doubt the ratings power of puke. Oh, and also because it's damn funny. That's probably part of it, too.
• HBO has ordered Luck to series, which seemed to be a mere formality given the Milch/Mann/Hoffman/Nolte core of the show. Alan Sepinwall raises a good point, however. What will the show's shelf life be once the notoriously overprepared Dustin Hoffman begins receiving new pages of dialogue from series creator David Milch in the midst of shooting a scene, a stunt that Milch is legendary for pulling on a regular basis? Maybe we should enjoy the first season while we can when it premieres in early 2011.
• My fifteen-year-old self loves this. MTV has announced that Mike Judge is at work on new episodes of Beavis And Butt-head that will air on the cable outlet sometime in the near future. The structure will stay the same as the show's 90s heyday -- scripted episodes that also include the characters commenting on contemporary music videos. The biggest news here, surprisingly, isn't the resurrection of the series but that, shit, MTV IS GOING TO BE PLAYING VIDEOS AGAIN. Kinda.
• Discovery Channel's Deadliest Catch attracted a whopping 8.5 million viewers (without question a record for the network) for its season premiere on Tuesday night which dealt with the death of Captain Phil Harris. Not to be crass but we'd venture to guess that those numbers will stay as a series high seeing as the show's star is, to put it delicately, an ex-human.
• Community is the latest series to get into the Betty White business. And by latest we mean the 268th.
• Sharktopus. Just saying.